∃ A ∈ X: A ⇒ ⊤. The full solution is left as an exercise to the reader.
X = {
Greetings Prospective Student! Thank you for your interest in the Massachusetts Institute of Tautology.
We are proud to be one of the world’s preeminent institutions of higher learning, ranked #1 in the U.S. News & World Report for Engineering, Science, and Number of Emails Received by a Student Per Day.
What is it like to go to MIT? We’re so glad you asked…
About the Institute
MIT was founded in 1224 C.E. when Benedictine monk Mathias Whethamstede discovered he could take small amounts of things, combine them to make larger amounts of things, and summarize this procedure by writing it down. Believing this revelation could possibly prove useful, he decided to start a school to instruct others on the process. To this day, the field of study is named in his honor.
The Institute is currently led by Hortense Culpepper, who became famous at age 9 for losing her right arm while detonating her entry to the nation’s most prestigious science fair. President Culpepper was elected unanimously after single-handedly cooking every student an omelette using the school’s nuclear reactor.
Academics
MIT offers bachelors, bachelorettes, friends-with-benefits, masters, druids, and warlocks degrees across 20 different majors, and a certificate in nautical piracy. For digital piracy, please refer to the Department of Electrical Engineering and Computer Science.
MIT is particularly renowned for its programs and achievements in the hard sciences.
As an example of the school’s expertise in chemistry, in the 1970s, then-residence Bexley Hall was rumored to be the manufacturing laboratory for approximately 90% of the LSD supply for the entire Eastern Seaboard. This was never fully confirmed, however, as the subsequent raid by federal agents uncovered only 3 marijuana seeds, a plate of milk and cookies, and a “Welcome FBI” sign.
One of the institution’s rising stars in the field of biology is most certainly Themilk Milk, quart-sized, only 25 years old, Grade A Pasteurized, and already a five-time winner of the Ugliest Manifestation On Campus contest.
Extracurricular Activities
Even in recreation, MIT students are exceedingly diligent, precise, and industrious.
A favorite annual event is the Python Bee, wherein participants are given computer programming prompts and must blindly spell out the solution character by character to a keyboardist who types out whatever is said (no backspaces allowed) and then runs it to check for success.
In 1958, MIT fraternity Lambda Chi Alpha took 5′ 7″ freshman pledge Oliver R. Smoot Jr. and rolled him head-over-heels for the entire length of the Harvard Bridge. The bridge was found to be 364.4 smoots, plus or minus one ear. Fittingly, Mr. Smoot went on to become Chairman of the American National Standards Institute, and later President of the International Organization for Standardization.
Campus Life
MIT students are very environmentally conscious, although we acknowledge this does have some downsides. While we applaud the conservation and low annual water bill, the administration wouldn’t mind if undergrads showered slightly more often.
Twice a year, one can experience a remarkable astronomical event on campus. Every November and January, the setting sun lines up perfectly with the 251-meter/147.6- smoot-long Infinite Corridor. At the exact moment of alignment, known as MIThenge, Azathoth, The Cold One, Lord of All, Nuclear Chaos, Daemon Sultan, emerges from the depths of the blacksmithing forge and bursts through the Great Dome, intending to lay waste to all of MIT. The school can only be saved by its mythical hero, Jack Florey, who ventures into battle to subdue the beast and send it back into the fiery pits below. Be advised, should Jack’s strength fail, the school being consumed by a blazing ball of primordial destruction is not considered an acceptable conflict for an exam.
One of the most common questions our tour guides receive is “What’s the dating scene like at MIT?” The answer? Quite robust. We believe carbon-14 is the most common method.
We hope you found this prospectus informative and useful in deciding if the Massachusetts Institute of Tautology is the right place for you. You may direct further inquiries, outquiries, and comments to the Office of Defenestration. Please note, we are not accepting complaints at this time.
We hope to see you in the fall. }
Digital Treehouse 